I was watching the Biggest Loser yesterday and one of the contestants, Rudy, talked about his sister dying from cancer when she was young. This fact surprised the trainers, especially Jillian. While Rudy was exercising, Jillian tried to find out why Rudy kept the information hidden. He said something like he didn't want to tell anyone that part of his life. She continued to press Rudy to explain. He said his sister was diagnosed around age 14 and he was about 12. His parents immediately stayed with their daughter at the hospital and that meant Rudy was cared for by other relatives. Jillian pressed Rudy to let out his emotions from dealing with being "abandoned" (Jillian's word, not Rudy's) by his parents. Jillian thinks that Rudy put on the weight because of this emotional stress in his young life. He was cared for and loved but kept his feelings bottled up inside. Watching this unfold in front of me, the keeping emotions and feeling inside, was something I could relate to in my own life. I don't think I have a specific event in my life when I started to hold in my feelings and my hurt. I was always quiet and never spoke up when something bothered me. I need to scream and let it out. I have to stop hiding within myself. I wanted to write more tonight but it's getting late and I need my sleep.
Thank you for reading.