Friday, August 7, 2009

Friday, August 7, 2009

It has been a week since my last confession -- posting an entry. It's tough to remember the feelings I had and the events of the days since the last posting so I will try again to post daily. I wish words would come out of me like other blogs I have read. Their thoughts "read" much better then I could ever do myself. I know this is one reason I take 3-4 hours to write my blog. I write a phrase and then delete part of it and then make changes and then delete the changes and then write a whole different phrase and the cycle repeats. I am not focused?

Monday was my TOPS meeting and I was unsure what the scale would reveal. I had a banana and oatmeal for breakfast and a Lean Cuisine for lunch. I recently started to write in a food journal so I did track the calories I ate. I was generally over the 1500 limit I set for myself; however, the scale gave me a -2.4 result. YAY. Ater coming home from the meeting I ate a normal dinner but somewhere around 9pm I grabbed pretzles out of the cupboard that I purchased the evening before. I saw what a serving size amount was and how many caloires a serving was then I saw myself take the bag to the table. While I was on the computer reading a blog and watching the DVR of my soap, I would pull out a pretzel and then another and then another and another. I guess I had 40 to 50 pretzles. My fingers were busy eating, typing on facebook and working the remote. I guess I love multi-tasking!

Tuesday after work I planned on looking at a local furniture store for a bedroom set. I asked Scott to come along. I had 2 or 3 ideas from the stores ad. Scott provided his advice and then I chose a bedroom grouping. He also liked my choice of mattress. Earlier I had my typical breakfast and lunch. I was worrying about going home and how much I would eat. I did grab the pretzel bag again. I need to break my bad habits!

Wednesday was the same foods for breakfast and lunch. I had the next 2 days off work so I was hoping this day would be similar to the last two. It was! YAY. I met Scott at a Subway after work because I had a seminar to attend for 1st time home buyers. I went to hear information and to prepare for what I need to do. The wife of the bands former bassist is a realator and she was one of the speakers. The meeting was over around 8:30 and I made my way home. I had just about finished the pretzles over the last 2 days so I was less worried I would eat again. I didn't but from all the salt I ingested with the pretzels, my ankles and feet were swelling up. I have to NEVER buy salty pretzles!

I stayed up WAY late reading a blog. It was a blog from the singer in Scott's band. In fact, I had been staying up late for about 5 days reading all her entries over 2+ years period. Her husband was dealing with a cancer diagnosis and I had a similar situation with cancer 7 years ago. Both of our loved ones died as a result of the cancer. I wanted to get it all read before their show on Thursday. I never met him prior to reading the blog but after reading his words, I felt like he was a friend and I mourned his loss. I wish I knew of blogs when I was dealing with my husbands cancer and his death. She has a written record of his words and his feelings. As time has gone by, I have forgotten much about my husband. I am sure she has re-read some of the postings and loves to "hear" him again!

I will end my blog here and pick-up with Thursday thru Saturday in my next blog.

Wishing for better tomorrows

1 comment:

  1. Congrats on the loss!!!! I'm not sure how open you are to advice...but I'm noticing a pattern with something, that if you change it, may give you another 1-2 lb loss on the scale every week ON TOP of the awesome work you're already doing.

    I know the Lean Cuisines are decent calorie-wise, but I was wondering if you knew how much sodium they had in them? The boxed/canned/processed foods are usually high in sodium and will cause you to retain water, just like the pretzels do, and I notice you eat them nearly every day as your lunch routine.

    I'm only mentioning this because my Dad got in the habit of eating Lean Pockets every day at home (he's retired) because they were so easy and they said "Lean" in the title so he thought he was doing something good for himself. What he actually did was throw himself into hypertension with a dangerously high blood pressure, and his doctor is the one that traced it back to the daily Lean Pockets. Just something to think about. :)